I really do. But there are always obstacles in the way, ruining everything. I can’t remove or avoid them. People say “Nobody is an island” but that’s not true. I am an island. Unable to reach other islands out there, just like they can’t reach me.
I really do. But there are always obstacles in the way, ruining everything. I can’t remove or avoid them. People say “Nobody is an island” but that’s not true. I am an island. Unable to reach other islands out there, just like they can’t reach me.
My story is very different from the usual homeless stories, starting with how I became homeless. This alone makes me an island. I tried for over ten years to connect with other homeless but that never worked because we had nothing in common. I sometimes give them patches and a little bit of povidone iodine or I call the ambulance if they’re injured but that’s all I can do. I’m too broke to give them money for anything (Something I used to do before I became homeless myself).
I know I’m not the only one with this story but I can’t find the other islands nor are they able to find me.
You know what I learnt in life now that I’m older? Everyone’s story is very different from the usual. So much so, that it’s hard to know where “usual” comes from. You are making a connection right now with me. It’s not much, but it’s a message in a bottle to your island :)
Also there’s a poetry inside your messages. Maybe try writing your experiences down? As I said, if you start sharing your story, you’ll find so many people who can relate. Maybe there’s a community centre near you or a outreach project. Maybe you want to paint a sign offering street tours. Maybe you want to start busking.
But it feels like it’s very important to your identity to be “an island apart from the other islands”. Everything that’s familiar, even if it’s misery, will be hard to let go. I found that to be true myself as well. I was so focused on feeling miserable that I couldn’t feel better. That would have meant giving up my identity. And that’s scary.
We can keep chatting.
Oh and btw: check your local library for working spots
There is no point in writing the whole story down because nobody would believe it who didn’t suffer the exact same. There isn’t even a place to upload it because it would get taken down immediately (Because it would make a lot of people angry). To speak such a truth I would need the fastest horse in the world but all I got are sore legs.
There’s only one library remaining which still features outlets and it’s overrun by tourists because it’s a historical building so I would only get a maximum of one hour - a noisy hour. I would also need a library card which I can’t get because I have no ID. I ordered a new ID a year ago, by now it’s safe to assume I will never get a new one. Lots of money thrown out of the window.