Intelligence is hot, arrogance is not
I’m a woman with a STEM PhD, and several of the guys I’ve dated have decided to prove they are smart enough to date me by looking up my publications from grad school (20 years ago now), reading them, and then trying to impress me by trying to poke holes in them or otherwise making me defend them on the spot.
That tactic is now an instant method to get me to end contact. It betrays a deep insecurity with my having expertise greater than theirs on any topic, even ones I have decades of work in. No Jimmy, you can’t become my peer by reading a few papers. I don’t think you are dumb, but I’m not spending time with you to massage your ego about your insecurity. Byyyye
This is the most toxic male behavior ever. It has all the hallmarks - arrogance, insecurity, and enough ‘subtly’ to seem ‘ok’ at first, only for it to be turned into something terrible
several of the guys I’ve dated have decided to… [look] up my publications from grad school
That’s so sweet! It’s nice when people make efforts to engage with your interests
trying to impress me by trying to poke holes in them or otherwise making me defend them on the spot
…nevermind.
What the hell is with that level of insecurity. My wife is smarter than me, it was pretty clear pretty quick, most people realize she’s smarter than them within a few hours of conversation. If you can’t handle dating someone smart you desperately need to get the fuck over yourself. But also you can just leave! Or find a constructive way to deal with those feelings! Sigh.
Like I get insecurity about academics, my life in early adulthood was rough and resulted in me leaving after my undergrad instead of staying to the minimum of a masters degree that was expected of me. But I can’t fucking imagine trying to deal with that by attempting to poke holes in a partner’s achievements.
I’m sorry do we have medieval Italian political satirists on the table for basic conversion? the crazy thing is, I’ve read books by all the individuals mentioned, and most of it is very old, and very specific to it’s time, and largely entertainment. this is like someone 500 years from now saying they can’t hold a conversation with someone if they don’t have a deep familiaity with the deeper meanings of The Simpsons and Family Guy and how they impacted society.
Meanwhile, I imagine the actual historians and scholars who study and teach of the classical world professionally rarely feel the need to drop lists like this.
Real historians will be busy out-drinking you
“Not this shit again”
They probably have more insightful conversations avoiding these specific *phers.
Big Dictionary Energy
You wrote Cellini twice, idiot.
That’s a literary technique called “anaphora”, or in layman terms, “repeating shit”, it’s a highly advanced technique used to emphasize the importance of something, his use of it is actually a demonstration of how much of a big brain smart boy he is
/j
We like Cellini.
Charming…
Maybe it’s like Dumas…
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: don’t be like this guy
I meet none of those criteria and I actually wish that would stop these people from talking at me.
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: Cézanne, Renoire, Rembrandt, van Eyck, David, Vermeer, Fragonard, Turner, Courbet, Matisse, Kahlo, Picasso, Basquiat, Richter
hey look, i can gatekeep my special interest, too! 🤦
No van Gogh? Fucking casual.
/s
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: Scott, Palmer, Malone, Hudson, Martinez, Martin, Howard, Kapoor, Bratton, Lapin-Vance, Bernard, Lewis, Hannon, Philbin, Halpert, Beesly, Schrute
It’s kind of fun in an ironic meme way!
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: Final Fantasy, Final Fantasy II, Final Fantasy III, Final Fantasy IV, Final Fantasy V, Final Fantasy Tactics, Final Fantasy VI, Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII Dirge of Cerberus, Final Fantasy VIII, Final Fantasy IX, Final Fantasy X, Final Fantasy X-2, Final Fantasy Tactics 2, Final Fantasy XI, Final Fantasy XII, Final Fantasy XIII, Final Fantasy XIV, Final Fantasy XV, Final Fantasy XVI, Final Fantasy VII Remake, Final Fantasy VII Rebirth
Dirge of Cerberus was very underrated.
Bare minimum for holding a conversation: Obscure conspiracy theory websites and subreddits, Robert Monroe, Courtney Brown, David Icke, Aldous Hickey, Michael Palin, Steven Greer, John Lear, Richard C. Hoagland, and Linda Moulton Howe
Also you must be able to quote at length from the original Time Cube by memory.
Buttons. Keeps the saliva moving.
Edit: Sorry, that was just “Cube.” Still counts.
Censoring the slurs or no?
“Guy who keeps a Rubiks cube in a display stand on his desk at work so he can explain it’s not that hard to solve them” energy.
“I know, I just taught my niece how to solve one. She’s so smart they’re letting her skip kindergarten!”
Some people mistake knowledge for intelligence
👆
many also mistake arrogance for confidence
Almost everyone mistakes sharts for farts
Don’t take risks you can’t manage imo
Might be time to take a look at your diet.
Maybe if I always mistook farts for sharts. It’s pretty forgivable to occasionally in your lifetime do the opposite, especially when you’re old old.
Oh come on, a dude who makes this post definitely has not bothered to read any of the above.
Best line (quote?) I’ve read in a while. Well done sir.
A person can be highly inteligent and still be clueless for human interaction. But being well spoken, well read, attentative and polite usually indicates someone is well adjusted towards others.
There’s different areas of intelligence. Having high intelligence in math and logic doesn’t necessarily mean you have social intelligence
I used to have a friend like this. He was always acting like a condescending prick to everyone for not knowing as much about his favorite books.
I don’t talk to him any more.
I had a friend like this, too. I have a memory of him saying “uncultured swine” because I enjoyed Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy and thought six hours of the Godfather sounded awful.
That was highschool, though. He turned around over the next few years; now we’re thirty and I happily see him every week because he’s our DM. I’m not saying you were wrong to stop talking to that dude, not at all you gotta set boundaries, just wanted to say that there is at least one example of growth!
That hits very close to home.
Unfortunately my friendship with said person ended up blowing up, because he had never had that period of self reflection and course correction.
I’m glad it worked out for you and your friend though.
Wild that hitchikers guide would be considered uncultured
Imagine doing this with any field other than humanities and you’ll see how ridiculous it is.
Like are you talking to a cohort in your weirdo western canon circlejerk college program? Because otherwise you might have to be flexible about the where the conversation goes. And then you might actually learn something rather than just do keyword association bingo to “impress” your conversation partner with your incredible knowledge.
Bare minimum to enjoy a beer around a campfire: ACDC, Rolling Stones, Lynyrd Skynyrd, White Stripes, Dire Straits, Genesis, Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, Kenny Loggings, Gorillaz, Jefferson Airplane, The Animals, Bon Jovi, R.E.M, Bonnie Tyler, Eminem, 50, System of a Down, Rage against the Machine, Rob Zombie, Nirvana, Papa Roach, Tenacious D, Dorothy, Floggin Molly, The Subways, Bush, Disturbed, Wolfmother, Guns and Roses, Scorpions, ZZ Top, Armand van Helden, Die Antwoord, Billy Idol, Fleetwood Mac, Ram Jam, Eagels of Death Metal, deadmau5, Foreigner, Daniel Norgen, The Weekend, Cari Cari, Shakira, Cher, Gaga, Rihanna, Michael, Prince
Name 5 songs
thunderstruck, thunderstruck, thunderstruck, thunderstruck, thunderstruck
Twinkle twinkle little star
Itsy bitsy spider
Mary had a little lamb
Jack and Jill
Row, row, row your boat
black betty
amber lamps.
hopital
How did Hendrix and The Hu not make the list?
no Phish?!? check out billy breathes sometime great campfire album.
Uh huh. Uh, yeah. Oh, I recognize some of these!
Cellini so important that it’s listed twice.
Cellini so important I never heard of it in my life.
Pathetic. I don’t even talk to people who haven’t read Cellini’s complete works at least thrice.
Only thrice! Percieve the barbarian. Ho ho ho.
I just looked the name up in Wikipedia and found a sculptor with that name. Wild story, talented artist though.
and his autobiography, which has been described as "one of the most important documents of the 16th century
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benvenuto_Cellini
The Autobiography of Benvenuto Cellini https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/4028
Now I am honor-bound to read this. I’ll let you know how it goes. Thanks!
Oh! He’s the one that did the Perseus sculpture that gave me nightmares when I was six. That’s neat.
Maybe, it’s his reminder to drink some Grappa while reading.
